LOL I blame my own warped sense of humour which is forced to reside in the sewer along with the rest of the brain...the gutter's to clean. I typed this directly to post so any hiccups are because I don't have the crutch of grammar checks...meh. No continuity of any kind really other then the fact that Northstar is an X-Man and hating life as usual.

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Flame Wha?

Jean-Paul Beaubier was having one of those days. The students were rebelling his latest project...par for the course...the American government was condemning him and others just like him for existing...par for the course again...he was stuck on the wrong side of the border...his own choice...one which he was questioning as usual every five seconds. And now he was trying really hard not to just jump the object of his secret desire and have his wicked way with the frozen X-Man.

Instead he remained painfully silent as Bobby flipped through channels looking for something, anything, to watch. Bobby spotted an ad for an upcoming movie and paused.

"They're getting their own damn movie now!?!?" Bobby whined. Jean-Paul just cocked an eyebrow and watched for a few seconds before figuring out who the film was about. "That don't look like New York." Bobby muttered as he watched the film trailer.

"It's Vancouver." Jean-Paul stated. He couldn't help chuckling at Bobby's snort of distaste and muttered comments about Canadians and Canada in general.

"That looks nothing like Johnny!" Bobby hollered after a few more seconds...not that Jean-Paul cared when he got a good look at the actor.

"Oh salut. Mon nom est Jean-Paul. Est tu?" He purred.

I'm so telling the match stick the next time I see him dude." Bobby teased.

Jean-Paul just waved dismissively towards his companion as the ad came to an end. Two words that closed it out though suddenly had him laughing. Bobby turned to look at the Canadian as he began sliding down in his seat, laughing harder then anyone could recall since Jean-Paul’s arrival at the school more then a year ago.

“Okay…either you’ve finally snapped and gone ga-ga or the Fantastic Four getting their own movie is so outrageously hilarious, yer running the risk of choking to death.” Bobby mumbled as he stared on in awe.

After a few attempts at speaking and a coughing fit, Jean-Paul finally managed to tell Bobby what he’d found so funny all of a sudden. “I never realised it before about the Torch…and people have the balls to call me flaming.” Jean-Paul succumbed to another laughing fit, while Bobby just puzzled over what he’d said. Then it dawned on him in all of its glorious, crude, and tasteless, meaning. The Iceman lost it and joined his team mate in laughter.

Hours later in the Baxter Building, Johnny Storm stared at the answering machine as the message replayed for the sixth time. “Bobby bud…what are they feeding you over there? Acid?” He muttered.

“Who you talkin’ to?” Ben Grimm piped up.

Johnny turned to his friend and jerked a thumb at the answering machine. “Bobby called…something about Northstar and my ‘Flame On’ thi…that bastard!” Johnny laughed. The Thing was going to comment except that he’d dropped his cigar during the last part. Sue was going to kill him for burning another hole into her slip covers.


FINI!