Reality can also be distorted by too much turkey.
Reality can also be distorted by too much turkey.
Tell me more, I'm intriqued by this concept.Originally Posted by Ahab
Reality can also be distorted by too much turkey.
Del
Driftwood: Well, I got about a foot and a half. Now, it says, uh, "The party of the second part shall be known in this contract as the party of the second part."
Fiorello: Well, I don't know about that...
Driftwood: Now what's the matter?
Fiorello: I no like-a the second party, either.
Driftwood: Well, you should've come to the first party. We didn't get home 'til around four in the morning... I was blind for three days!
Well, take an 18 - 20 lb bird (more or less, depending on size of family. Del, you'd need about five 20 lb'ers), roast them for about 6 - 8 hours to get the right amount of fermented tryptophan (a natural seditive), don't forget the fifteen - twenty lb's of pototoes (the starch, with the right enzymes become sugar that ferments into alcohol). Then you got miscellanious veggies and h'or d'ourves (or however it's spelled), plus traditional drinks (many of which are already alcohol-laden).Tell me more, I'm intriqued by this concept.Reality can also be distorted by too much turkey.
Yeah, there's a reason Canadians have Thanksgiving a month early - we need the extra time to sober up before Christmas!!
Allan 'HappyCanuck' Crocker
"Hey... Philosophers love wisdom, not mankind."
- Stephen Pastis, Pearls Before Swine
The same effect can be achieved by having somone rush up behind you and wrap a 18-20lb turkey around the back of your head. Concussiion ensues, but at least you don't have to eat the turkey. I'd rather chew cardboard, which has a better taste IMHO.
Del
Driftwood: Well, I got about a foot and a half. Now, it says, uh, "The party of the second part shall be known in this contract as the party of the second part."
Fiorello: Well, I don't know about that...
Driftwood: Now what's the matter?
Fiorello: I no like-a the second party, either.
Driftwood: Well, you should've come to the first party. We didn't get home 'til around four in the morning... I was blind for three days!
Have you thought about putting the turkey on your head, wearing oversized sunglasses and a fez, and dancing?
Worked on Friends.
- Le Messor
"Beware the legless man who teaches running."
Mr Bean did it better. Not sure what is the better option, eating the turkey or sticking your head up it's arse. Opinions?
Del
Driftwood: Well, I got about a foot and a half. Now, it says, uh, "The party of the second part shall be known in this contract as the party of the second part."
Fiorello: Well, I don't know about that...
Driftwood: Now what's the matter?
Fiorello: I no like-a the second party, either.
Driftwood: Well, you should've come to the first party. We didn't get home 'til around four in the morning... I was blind for three days!
Thanks to Happy Canuck for doing a pretty darn good job of covering the whole turkey meal prep summary! I'm finally out of my coma, so I can now respond...
I guess it depends on what the turkey has been eating...Mr Bean did it better. Not sure what is the better option, eating the turkey or sticking your head up it's arse. Opinions
Sorry...I never said that I wasn't capable of disgusting thoughts...
I would assume the turkey to be dead and de-gibleted. Inserting your head into the rear orifice of a live viable turkey would seem to be a difficult proposition and slightly suspect.Thanks to Happy Canuck for doing a pretty darn good job of covering the whole turkey meal prep summary! I'm finally out of my coma, so I can now respond...
I guess it depends on what the turkey has been eating...Mr Bean did it better. Not sure what is the better option, eating the turkey or sticking your head up it's arse. Opinions
Sorry...I never said that I wasn't capable of disgusting thoughts...
Del
Driftwood: Well, I got about a foot and a half. Now, it says, uh, "The party of the second part shall be known in this contract as the party of the second part."
Fiorello: Well, I don't know about that...
Driftwood: Now what's the matter?
Fiorello: I no like-a the second party, either.
Driftwood: Well, you should've come to the first party. We didn't get home 'til around four in the morning... I was blind for three days!
another fun thing is, before the turky is prepped and stuffed, put an egg in it. Depending on the frame of mind of the cook, this can amuse, shock or downright frighten the cook.
Beratement by my mother for doing this one time has become a Thanksgiving tradition for the past fifteen years.
www.kozzi.us
recent publications in M-Brane Science Fiction and the anthology Things We Are Not.
Forthcoming stories in Breath and Shadow, Star Dreck anthology and The Aether Age: Helios.
~I woke up one morning finally seeing the world through a rose colored lense. It turned out to be a blood hemorrhage in my good eye.
A really serious reality-altering substance is the most wonderous teriyaki chicken at Top Gun Sushi...(it's basically like BBQ but UBER).
Canada rules supreme.
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